I hope everyone’s well.
Here’s a continuation of my story in honour of Halloween – to be continued next Thursday
October 29, 1987
I never wanted any trouble! I swear it! Please! Please, NO!
She was obviously out of her mind. That’s right. I think to myself as I’m washing my hands. My mind is wondering again, dear friend, tracing my steps from last night to this moment. I slump down onto my grey coach and there’s a cat licking my finger, wanting some affection. Someone to love it. I lift the kitten to my face and force it to look at me – dead in the eye. “Don’t be scared, I won’t hurt you” I whisper to the struggling cat; its wide eyes are darting from side to side like pin-balls. Why does everybody think I’m going to hurt them? Do you know, friend of mine? Do I look like someone who could hurt an animal?
I stand up and study myself in the mirror, rearranging my wavy hair so that it curtains the right parts of my face. I accidentally look at myself dead in the eye. My lungs fill with air and fire. I snatch the mirror from the wall and slam it against the wooden floor. The cat scurries for its life towards the door. “IT’S LOCKED DUMB CAT! YOU USELESS, UGLY RODENT OF A CAT!” I steel one of the shards off the floor and aim as well as I can.
Scared you, didn’t I? You told me you wouldn’t get scared. You promised. I swear I’m normal. I swear I’m just like you. Please Don’t be scared. I’m about to take you on a journey. Yes, that’s right! A journey! You can laugh with me and play with me and we’ll be the happiest people alive. Yeah, that’s right, see. We’ll be the happiest people alive! We just need to get through this bit first, that’s all. Take my hand. That’s it, does it hurt? No, of course not, see. I won’t hurt you. So please, just let me take you through my world. I can change. You’ll see, because you love me, right?
Do you want to know why I love the night? Of course you do, honey. That’s why I chose you. Well, there’s no one out there to hide from me. There’s only me and this butcher knife. It’s my friend too. Just like you are, sugar. My friend that doesn’t run from things, but plunges into them instead. I know what that feels like and boy, does it feel good. Yeah, that’s right. It feels good. Do you want to have a go? It won’t hurt… Maybe if I did it for you? You’d like that right? To feel what I feel? You answer no? Then you’re not getting the point at all. I’m not going to hurt you! I swear! You’ll only make things worse if you refuse. Good. Now that I have your trust, love, I can show you the rest of my story.